Big Screen Blurb: Prometheus

It's Alien meets Star Trek meets Indiana Jones meets, well, you get the picture. There's a lot going on here and it's all good. Actually, it's very good in fact, and very much worth a look. It's Prometheus., a sci-fi rarity that combines an intriguing plot with interesting but distant characters and plenty to keep you on  your toes.

Welcome aboard Prometheus. It's a deep space vessel with a mission. That mission is one that addresses the basics of humanity. Where did we come from and who helped us get here?The answer:  Evolution? Hmm...Nope. The Bible's Adam and Eve? Wrong again--why the fundamentalists aren't picketing this one, I've yet to figure out. However, the scientists aboard this particular spaceship do think they've got it all figured out. The hypothesis: our civilization stems from theirs. They created us and left us on our fair planet.  The trouble is, this isn't exactly a mission to find dear old dad. In fact, they don't know what they expect to find. What will it be: A) Mystery; B) Danger; C) Death? Yadayadayada the crew endures plenty of D) All of the Above. 


It's good. I'll go with 4.0 Stars. I admit that this one had not spiked my radar at all, despite the nearly 12-months of teaser trailers, but it delivers big time. It's an intriguing story that reminded me very strongly of the original Alien, with good cause. It's not exactly a star-studded cast, which helps you focus more on the story and that is, indeed, what carries this one. Actually, you don't know who to connect with in this one, character-wise. It's obviously supposed to be one of the two scientists, but that doesn't really happen. Nor is it David (Michael Fassbender), who is one part C3PO, one part Data from Star Trek and one part Zachariah Smith (Lost in Space). Actually, when it comes to the cast of characters, they seem to each have a dark streak that makes you resist them completely or seriously question their motives along the ride.


Make no mistake--this one is not a thrill-a-minute action/adventure. The intrigue is grounded in a plot that unfolds without too many lulls and plenty of questions that you, as a viewer, want answered. Ultimately, we learn more, but want to know more, which is always the mark of a good story and a good story teller. This is exactly what Director Ridley Scott delivers here. 


With that in mind, see it! Unless you are just adamantly opposed to the genre, go ahead and see it BIG! Heck, it's so insanely hot, a trip into deep space might be just the trick to cooling you off!


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Big Screen Blurb: That's My Boy

That's My Boy. It's not your conventional Father's Day flick. Then again, he's not your conventional father. He's Donnie Berger (Adam Sandler). Donnie is a guy who never really grew up, but might find a needed push in finding some paternal pride in his scared and scarred son, Han Solo (Andy Samberg). 

Meet Donnie. He's got your standard fare story: At the age of 13, he starts having sex with his Math teacher...knocks her up...as such, he's celebrated as a reputed hero, experiencing plenty of fame and fortune from a TV movie, teen mag covers, etc. The trouble is, Donnie is just a kid himself, so he blows through $100,000 like any kid would. Further, he realizes that the novelty of being 'the kid who knocked up the Teach' is gone once he begins to drift further away from puberty. All the while, he raises his kid, promptly named Han Solo Berger as any kid would: poorly! Now, he's facing prison for tax evasion, if he can't come up with a whopping $43k in a mere 72 hours. Fortunately, Han is doing very well. He's a hedge fund manager and quite the success in spite of his dad. Han has lost most of his 400 pounds that he put on while eating a steady sugar diet as a kid. He's even managed to position himself as a partner in his firm despite his numerous anxiety issues. 

With all of that in mind, Donnie sets out to coerce Han into making an appearance at his mom's prison, where a talk show host (Dan Patrick) will lie in wait for a reality show set-up. This will earn Donnie a get-out-of-jail-free check to the tune of $50,000. But wait--things get complicated. Father and son start bonding like, well...kinda like father and son. Kinda. Yadayadayada Donnie starts acting a little bit like a dad on his way to helping Han Solo make the kessel run in 12 parsecs...wait, that's THE Han Solo. Donnie helps Han Solo Berger more than he'll ever know. 

Ya know, it's pretty entertaining. I'll go with 3.5 Stars on this one. If you follow the Yada, you know that I'm a big Adam Sandler fan. However, our relationship is quite hot and cold. He's either great (like Happy Gilmore or Just Go With It) or absolutely lousy (like Deuce Bigelow or Waterboy). That's My Boy was a unique experience, however. Thirty minutes into this one, it had Deuce Bigelow written all over it. Somewhere along the way, however, it turns a major corner and becomes, not only genuinely funny but a good story as well. Make no mistake about it. This is not a family flick. It may actually be the raunchiest movie I've seen, period. Maybe it was me. Maybe I just adjusted to the raunchy humor; embraced it and began to enjoy the 2-hour ride. I'm not sure. I do know that, ultimately, this was a fun movie. 

Part of that fun is the cast. You get Sandler's typical crew (Rachel Dratch, Nick Swardson, etc.), that are staples for his movies. That's My Boy has some added star power. Along with Samberg, there's Tony Orlando and Vanilla Ice, not to mention a cameo role for Todd Bridges. No Oscars going out here, mind you, but it is what it is: a raunchy movie about all kinds of taboo sex and smutty stuff that will make the less uptight laugh and your Aunt Betty cringe, if not pass out. If you fall into the former category...see it BIG; if you're among the latter, save yourself some smelling salt expense and skip it. Actually, I'm glad to be counted among the former group, because once this one turned that corner, it put plenty of smiles on my face. 

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P.S. Happy Father's Day, Dad...you are missed every minute of every day!

Big Screen Blurb: Rock of Ages (Early Screening)

If you've forgotten any rock songs from the 80's, never fear. They play each and every one of them in Rock of Ages. Of course, this is not a problem if you are a fan of the era, which I am for the most part. Subsequently, I have become a groupie for the Rock of Ages, a flick that combines some fresh faces with plenty of star power to rock the joint.

Sherrie (Julianne Hough) is just a small town girl...living in a lonely world. She took a midnight train going anywhe...wait, going to Los Angeles. Drew (Diego Boneta) is a city boy, born and raised in south Detr...wait, I don't really know where he's from but he's a bar keep at the infamous Bourbon Room. It's a famous rock joint managed by Dennis Dupree (Alec Baldwin) with help from Lonny (Russell Brand). The trouble is simple: the bar is struggling. Dennis hasn't paid taxes in more than a year. Just as frightening, he's facing an upstart fundamentalist group led by mayoral first lady, Patricia Whitmore (Catherine Zeta-Jones), that wants to bring Rock-N-Roll to it's knees. Dennis is counting on megastar, Stacee Jaxx (Tom Cruise) to save the bar. The trouble is simple: Stacee is out there. By out there, I mean...well, he's well beyond the rings of Uranus and his greedy manager Paul (Paul Giamatti) is no help. Drew and Sherrie are trying to save the day, but these star-crossed lovers have issues of their own. Yadayadayada...it takes a combined effort from all involved to salvage a rock museum like the Bourbon Room. 

It's good. I'll go with 3.5 Stars on this one. I'm not typically a fan of musicals, but Rock of Ages is an entertaining rock-n-roller coaster ride, carrying plenty of tunes with everything from Pat Benatar to Starship. It's fun. Sure, the music is good...great at times, but the characters are just as enjoyable. Actually, they made it for me. Except for some Def Leopard and Journey...those scenes, well--rocked! Tom Cruise is awesome as Stacee Jaxx. He's tremendous in the zany, off-kilter rock star role. I love when this guy moves away from his signature action/adventure genre in favor of the whacky. I'm still laughing from his role in Tropic Thunder. Meanwhile, the newcomers are solid in their own right, while Baldwin and Brand provide added comic relief. 

On the downside, it's loooooong. I can deal with a 2-hour flick when the story sweeps the time away in favor of an enthralling adventure. This plot is not bad--it's certainly predictable, but let's face it, this flick is about the music and the star power. It was certainly a fun ride and, with a strong ending, which made the 123 minutes well worth it. However, I admit that around the 90-minute mark I was reaching for the remote in my mind in an effort to fast forward this one a bit. 

All in all, if you're a rock fan, especially a rock fan from the 80's, you'll want to see this one and see it BIG. If you have no use for the big hair or rock and roll, then there's probably not even a reason to rent this one. If you're not sure, well, Don't Stop Believin' and go for it! It's a good time!

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Big Screen Blurb: The Dictator

Over the top? Gross? Irreverent and insulting? Yes...always. Funny? Sometimes. It's The Dictator from Sacha Baron Cohen, a shock jock whose focus is film. Is it worth a big screen view to see the Hollywood version of Howard Stern? Well, we'll see.

Cohen plays Aladeen, the dictator of Wadiya. He's the proverbial emperor whose ruthlessly stupid but far too powerful for anyone to clue him in to this fact. So, he does his thing, which includes everything from high-end hookers of all persuasions to creating a weapon of mass destruction. The United Nations frowns upon the former, but really despises the latter, so the not-so-good admiral general is asked to appear in front of the U.N. Unfortunately for him, his brother (Ben Kingsley) has other ideas. Snubbed from the throne, big bro orchestrates a kidnap attempt, replacing Aladeen with a more (if you can imagine) stupid model. This leaves Aladeen to survive on his own in NYC. He meets Zoey (Anna Faris), an eco-friendly shop owner. She takes in Alison Burger--yeah...that's Aladeen. You can't expect him to use his own name!?! Yadayadayada...Aladeen plots to win back his thrown and cling to his position as dictator.

Eh...The Dictator has its moments, but this 83 minutes posts 3.0 Stars at best. It's basically Borat with a bonafide storyline and a lot less humor. One thing is certain. You can expect to be insulted...that seemingly is the point Cohen repeatedly tries to make. After all, this Dick Tater hit the scene with a pretty funny splash with Borat, where disrespect was the normative point.  Don't expect anything less with this flick. It does have more of a story to it, which simply means that it is trying to make a point to the main character. The point floats out there, although we're not really sure whether Aladeen ever really gets it.

Considering Cohen's goal with this, only a perverted imagination is the limit. Remember, irreverent shock is the goal, so whether it's a romantic scene with two lovebirds holding hands inside the orifice of a pregnant lady or the all powerful dictator learning to masturbate, mission accomplished. With that said, it has it's moments. Keep in mind, these 'moments' are those that draw a guilt-ridden type of laugh--the kind that says, "I really shouldn't be laughing at this, but it is kinda funny." That's an interesting response, right? Cutting to the quick of human nature and lifting the politically correct masks we wear. That's one view. However, this is probably better categorized as the same laughing that occurs when you see a booger dangle from the nose of a priest during a funeral service--you know you're in no position to laugh, but can't help but to at least chuckle.

Bottom line: it's not anything to rush out and see--obviously, I waited several weeks. So, don't go BIG on this one, unless you're just in the mood for that certain brand of stupid funny. Then, rent it when stupid strikes the funny bone.

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Big Screen Blurb: Snow White and the Huntsman

It's appearance on the big screen may make it the fairest fairy tale of all time. It's Snow White and the Huntsman. No, this is certainly no Disney version. However, with a great story quite true to the original, plenty of action and great characters, this flick is poised to knock the mirror right off the wall and be a great movie experience for adults and the more mature kiddies alike. 

Snow White (Kristen Stewart) lives a dream life. She's the daughter of the king and her pure heart leaves her as one of the fairest in the land. Enter Ravenna (Charlize Theron). She's used her cunning to marry Snow's dad, whom she quickly disposes of while locking up our heroine. Thus, she's now the top choice of the magical mirror for fairest. Until, that is, Ravenna realizes that she needs Snow's heart to forever ensure her status as both queen and fairest chick-a-dee. Snow escapes to the evil and dark forest, leaving Ravenna no choice but to summon the Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth). He's asked to retrieve Snow, with the promise of a return to life of his deceased, beloved wife as payment. Lucky for Snow, she is able to turn the Huntsman to team White. Yadayadayada Snow begins a trek to the Duke's castle, where she hopes to rally the troops and reclaim her crown.

It's good...very good, actually. I'll give it 4.0 Stars. There's a reason why this is such a classic, but it is the first time that I've experienced it in grown-up land. Why did I have to wait!?! After all, with Snow White and the Huntsman, I got a glimpse of the harmony this world is missing and the harmony that I've been wanting to see for so long. Yeah, this is a great tale with great characters. You quickly fall in love with Snow White. Snow can be summed up in one word: Harmony. Her presence brings a compassionate heart to all she encounters. Whether it is the Huntsman or the dwarfs...or me, her calm, healing serenity are magnets to her charms. Of course, where there's the potential for harmony, there's evil trying to disrupt it for the sake of greed and power; thus, the story. Kudos to Rupert Sanders (director) for staying so true to the story, letting it carry the classical tale without interpretive interruption. 

Of course, you can't have an amazing story without great characters. No disappointment in that department. Nor is there any letdown with the actors portraying them. Stewart is great as Snow White. You definitely feel the love here. Snow is supposed to personify purity and harmony. Stewart pulls that off nicely. She wasn't alone. Charlize Theron makes a great bitch, for certain; and, is anyone having a bigger summer than Chris Hemsworth? This guy nailed Thor in the all-time blockbuster hit, The Avengers, now, he is sparking prince-like comparisons with his portrayal of the Huntsman. They were not alone. Up and down this cast list are solid characters, well played. You grow to really dislike the bad guys--even if you were secretly snickering at them early (mainly for a bad haircut). And, let's not forget the dwarfs. It was actually a great surprise to see the cast of dwarfs be highly recognizable actors. It was also good to see that Sanders stuck with the big boy storyline and let the kiddie dwarf names go by the wayside.

All in all--no real complaints about this one. It's too well done from every angle to stretch for any semblance of criticism. You've got some great cinematic scenery created to fall in-line with a fantastical fantasy world. Sure, it's over 2-hours, but barely. I can always live with a two-hour flick in an action/adventure with a great story attached. Bottom line: See this and see it BIG. 

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